As I’m going to make sure to emphasize in every posting of this project, a major thank you to LunaLord for his assistance with concepts, additions, and gathering reference images (which aren’t in this version of the posted maze, so please use the link below if you feel you need those):
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1JyqYkKQ03LR2N1G6ZC4WoAgg29oUI1sIH2GD5IYiJis/edit?usp=sharing
HIGH CONCEPT
“Come one, come all to the greatest competition in Horror Nights history! Welcome to Battle Gore-Yale, where each week your distinguished host, yours truly, will pit some of the most gruesome creatures in this hellscape against each other to create a Horror Nights War!”
The Host
Every year, when Halloween Horror Nights opens, we are granted access to upwards of 15 different horrific worlds, each with its evil waiting behind the door. However, with rare exceptions, these threads of evil are kept intentionally separate. Their mixture could result in some significant universal damage if left unchecked. The creators of Halloween Horror Nights have taken great care to avoid mixing and matching these concepts blindly.
Unfortunately, an entity known as The Host doesn’t care for these rules in the slightest. Seeking to provide entertainment to an observing interdimensional audience, it’s his job to sink his claws into the Halloween Horror Nights multiverse and create a flurry of fascinating matchups as part of his new hit show – Battle Gore-Yale!
While an interdimensional police force is pursuing the Host, they cannot crack down on the exact location he’s broadcasting from. So The Host makes a bold move—for his season finale, he will hold a “Battle Gore-Yale” amongst his audience, teleporting them across time and space into the scenarios he presented throughout the show. The winner takes all!…if there IS a winner at the end of all 16 episodes of Horror Nights Warfare.
Living dolls try to string up mad puppeteers…a legendary detective trails a musical soul Collector…ghostly ships find themselves under siege from parasitic brooders…cathedral guardians try to hold off a horde of the undead…and much more!
Can you survive…Battle Gore-Yale?!
CONCEPT NOTES
This is my second crack at something resembling the “anniversary maze” format. The first was Horror Nights Carol, which feels like a million years ago. This was initially intended as a flat-out Hunger Games / Battle Royale knock; instead, I made it into something more like “Secret Wars” from Marvel, with different battles that tie together and occur concurrently. I was also, oddly enough, thinking of the Teen Titans episode “Winner Take All” with its’ 1v1 Tournament format (and the whole concept with the host is a bit riffed from that, as well as oddly enough, DJ Hallyboo from the Mario Party DS Anti-Piracy series).
This is an “unrealistic” treatment compared to all the others I’ve written recently. I knew I couldn’t contain myself to a few options, and I wanted to give every battle two scenes to breathe. This takes place inside Soundstage 22, but it’s probably too big for it—it’s perhaps too big for nearly every location, honestly. But this is my 40th treatment, a particular concept, and I wanted to indulge in unrealism for once to maximize the fun levels.
I hope you enjoy it! After this, I am unsure what’s next, but hopefully, something that’s just as fun!
SCENE 1: LET THE GAMES BEGIN! (INT. HOST’S STUDIO / EXT. S.S. FRIGHTANIC)
The first thing we see as we walk into Soundstage 22 is the grand gothic arches above our heads. These large pointed arches look as if they’ve perhaps been plucked right from the Gothic maze but have been very well-maintained and given a fresh new coat of paint. Banners hang down from these arches, championing support for some HHN fan favorites…
“I want Antonio Cabot to Forsake me!” (Take what you can from that.)
“We Luv Terra Cruentus!”
“Revenge Of The Sculders!”
Those are just a few examples. Imagine the signs you’d see at professional wrestling or sporting events. As we walk under arches and gaze upon these banners, pushing one or two out of the way as they hang down in our path, we also turn our heads to the sides and see that beautiful stained-glass windows have been put in place, portraying some of the battles we’ll see ahead…we see the troupe of Puppet Theatre putting Dollhouse dolls on strings…The Meetz Family and Roanoke colonists chopping a person up with an Amazon Cannibal looming over them…Gargoyles flying down into a horde of the undead and Plague Doctors…The Pumpkin Lord and Samhain are wrapped in roots…and most notably, the Terra Queen is looking up at the sight of Blizzrock & Pyrock blowing ice & fire through The Gorewood Tree.
At this point, we realize that someone has been talking to us the entire time we’ve been under the arches, but we’ve been so caught up in the beauty that we didn’t hear him until we got closer…
THE HOST
Come one, come all to YOUR Battle Gore-Yale! You’ve had the opportunity to see the bloodiest of the bloody, the goriest of the gory, and the scariest of the scary duke it out for nothing more than the thrill of the kill! Now, the final battle is here…it’s YOU versus THE HALLOWEEN HORROR NIGHTS MULTIVERSE! Survive…and I may grant you a life-changing prize…DIE…and you die, doomed to wander this mix-match maze for eternity!
The Host begins to laugh as the arches fade away. A raised platform with a more modern vibe, sleek and metallic, alien in a way, looms above us… The Host, with a large bloodied hat and a pompous black suit / red cape combination, stands on top, holding his microphone, which he’s speaking to us through.
Attached to this platform, top to bottom, are a series of notable Halloween Horror Nights items, with the implication being that our prizes enhance in power the farther we make it through. We see The Director’s camera, The Usher’s flashlight, Eddie’s mask…and further up, Bloody Mary’s cracked mirror, The Cane Of Souls…and near the tippy top, right under The Host, Fear’s Lantern. It’s unclear how these items were acquired and won’t be brought up again, so contestant interpretation is encouraged.
Turning to our left, we see that even though this Battle Gore-Yale is for the audience, there is still an audience for this particular show…though a peek at the rafters shows us that there are a lot of monsters in the crowd – vampires, werewolves, Body Collectors, some other HHN names that just missed the cut. Humans have watched them duke it out for several episodes, and now the shoes are on the other foot.
The Host begins to speak again, and we return our eyes upward as a spotlight shines on one more stained glass window behind The Host, the side of the S.S. Frightanic and Mouthbrooders climb up the sides…
THE HOST
The S.S. Frightanic’s rolling in from another dimension…but not even these ghosts and ghouls expect the MOUTHBROODERS swimming up from The Depths Of Fear to latch on to new hosts! Can ghosts HOST parasites? Let’s find out…
We turn the corner to see a smaller-scale, angled version of the S.S. Frightanic facade. The ship, facing us, has turned to the left, granting us access to what would’ve been the Fear In First Class entrance many years ago. Instead of the two skeletons re-enacting the Titanic scene, it’s a full-scale Mouthbrooder comedically holding up the halved Mouthbrooder corpse from the beginning of Depths Of Fear.
Fog rises from the water below to obscure any attempt to look down…and hide the presence of Mouthbrooder eggs implanted into portions of the ship. Just to the side of the opening, we see the Captain’s wheel hanging out alone. As we take a look, we’re startled by the S.S. Frightanic captain suddenly grabbing the wheel from the darkness and yanking himself into view… he’s picked up some Mouthbrooder eggs on his face. Still, he has the strength to begin turning the wheel in the manner that would line up this angle of the facade for us.
We walk into the opening…
SCENE 2: FEAR IN FIRST CLASS (INT. S.S. FRIGHTANIC – BALLROOM / CASINO)
Upon entering our first-class vacation, we’re not shocked that our stay looks anything but glamorous. The old Ballroom of the Frightanic has lost itself even more to time in the years we’ve spent away from it. The disco ball above, which was in complete working condition, has lost much of its outer shell as it spreads inconsistent light across the room. The walls, which previously only had cracks, now look like they’ve been shredded, with sporadic holes all over the room. The waltz music played with high quality back in the ‘90s is now horrifically distorted and constantly cutting in and out.
But, good news! The spinning waltz continues, though a closer look shows that the parasites, The Mouthbrooders, have made their way into the crew as some of the waltzes seem a bit forced, one party trying to escape the other, who is forcibly holding them in place as green substance begins to escape their mouths. The floor has piles of eggs breaking through them. The Frightanic guests are fighting for their afterlives, though, as the exact ball dress-wearing ghost that appeared in this room prior bursts out of a door with a small blade, with egg-shaped holes cut out of her skin. Looking towards the broken-down microphone stand (with no microphone), one of the infected miners from the Fathomcorp depths lumbers out, plastered with eggs and waterlogged from the eggs, which drug this corpse of a body up through the deep sea to the nearest prey.
We quickly proceed through an open door into the ship’s casino, which isn’t in much better condition. The green curtains surrounding us are disgusting-looking, caked with blood and decay. The roulette with the spinning head has been bogged down by eggs and acid, melting the table. From our right, the waitress from this room appears to us with her tray and screams but reveals that instead of another human head, she has a Mouthbrooder head decorated with its own eggs, which is a dreadful sight. Before we can proceed, the Scuba Girl from Fathomcorp, similarly waterlogged and egg-filled to the point that eggs threaten to burst out the seams of her suit, rushes us with a handful she wants to lodge down our throats.
We run forward and nearly stumble over the billiards table, expecting an undead croupier to approach from the curtain…but we hear the noises of a struggle…before finally, one of the fully-formed Mouthbrooders bursts out of the curtain at full speed to fling its’ gigantic head over the table at us! We quickly speed around to its’ right, as the table holds it back from doing anything more than following us with its’ head as we push through curtains…
SCENE 3: DEPTHS OF FRIGHT (INT. S.S. FRIGHTANIC – ELEVATORS / VAULT)
Just as we had attempted to do in the Fathomcorp mining facility, our only option is to escape and leave the vicious ghosts of the Frightanic to deal with their parasitic predators. Our immediate solution is in the elevator room, a hub room where they all happen to let patrons in and out. The doors to the elevators are all rusted and dinged, the smell of the rust flooding our noses.
We hear repeatedly dinging as the elevator doors keep popping open, at least most of them. One door stays closed…because it seems someone’s dog got…caught up, and the back half of a complete dog lays bleeding out right on the door. Maybe he can come back as a ghost! The reason for the state of the elevators is that the control panels on the walls have been smashed, some of the indents being filled with egg material. The floors are slimy and watery.
As the doors keep popping open, we’re eventually accosted by another one of the Frightanic ghosts that wields a blade toward us in a stabbing motion, not discriminating between us and the Mouthbrooders for good reason. We’re all “invaders” in the end. However, we see through a door that’s rapidly popping open and shut that there’s a Mouthbrooder at the end of the hallway…and suddenly, between opens and closes, the Mouthbrooder runs up and sticks his large body between the doors to hold them open and leer his fishy fangs towards us. We veer to the left and into another small room to escape…
The vault room contrasts with the rest of the ship. It is small and tight, with walls made primarily of metal and the unique door we just entered through. Rows of metal shelving adorn one wall, containing treasures and artifacts, some looking brand-new and some looking long abandoned. One notably large safe stuffed in a corner has gold pouring out of it…with eggs amongst the gold. Indeed, it didn’t come like that. While the presence of the Mouthbrooders isn’t as apparent, even this secure area isn’t safe.
From just behind the door, we’re startled by the presence of one of the Fathomcorp miners. They look like the eggs are pouring out of their mouth, barely contained by the mouth barriers. Their presence forces us further into the room, where the items on the shelf transition from things that make sense on the ship to items that are seemingly from another world – antique puppets, a music box, some puppet show scripts, and a miniature model set depicting a scene within a collapsed theatre.
Before we can leave the vault, we’re accosted by the security guard, who appears from behind the golden egg vault, wielding his nightstick and slapping it against his hand as he approaches us with a vengeance, telling us to make sure we check our items for eggs as we leave. We do so and leave the room afterward…
SCENE 4: DAMNED AUDIENCE (INT. GRANDEUR THEATRE – HOUSE)
THE HOST
The Grandeur Theatre’s captive audience is about to be subjected to the next act…an invasion from the Dollhouse Of The Damned! And keep your mouths shut for our special guest…
In a split second, we go from just above the water to encased underground, as if we were knocked out and placed in a new location. We’ve plunged into the main house of the Grandeur Theatre, just as collapsed as it was three years ago. Props are broken, furniture is overturned, and the seats remain heavily torn and damaged. The thick air smells of decay and…baby powder? The walls are covered with loads and loads of tiny dolls crawling downward as if intruding from holes aboveground.
Before we can even walk down, the burlesque dancer from the original Captive Audience maze attacks us between the seats and doll walls. She now holds a doll on some strings instead of the severed head she once had. She yells at the doll to “Move!” but it doesn’t, either not being a living doll or spiting its’ captor. Down a bit further, one of the dolls strikes back as the Hunter Bear from the original Dollhouse approaches us with a toy gun in hand that pops as he approaches us and growls.
Turning, we look up to the balcony where the patron originally stood and told us to “enjoy the show,” only to now find the Dollhouse’s hoarder standing on the balcony, combing the hair of a puppet, and pointing down towards us and the stage, saying that she will “make you ALL pretty!”.
She’s pointing at the stage because now standing on it, putting strings through the body of one of the sack people from the first rooms of Dollhouse, is the Patron, having been kicked down to the stage by the Hoarder, but taking some vengeance on these living dolls nonetheless. She stabs the needle and pulls it out, stringing it for control but also unstitching portions of it, replicating the behavior of the troupe member from the Costume Room earlier in the original maze.
These living dolls and mad puppeteers clash for control of the stage. Still, there’s another presence watching, a “special guest” hinted at…that in this room, we merely see peeking through the curtains of the stage behind the Grandeur Patron, two black sunken eyes with a hand poking through in a “shush” motion.
Heading through the exit of the theatre house, we prepare to head backstage in anticipation of meeting this special guest.
SCENE 5: CAPTIVE SILENCE (INT. GRANDEUR THEATRE – BEHIND THE STAGE)
We take a turn and end up right behind the curtain, in an area that is, at first glance, the finale scene of Puppet Theatre. The final hallway with all the dancing puppets in the windows transitions into the appearance of that terrible “Happy Twin Man” puppet as the theatre finally collapses completely. However, things here have changed even more drastically than in the previous room.
There is no noise, compared to the dialogue-packed main stage with crawling dolls, stitching noises, and the clicks and clunks of moving wood…just beyond the curtain, there is an eerie nothing. Yet, the little puppets in the windows are all still moving, commanded by unseen owners. We pass by one of the windows and see Billy The Puppet (James Wan likes puppets named Billy) doing a little jig in place of where the gnome was…and before we can process the change, we’re accosted by the clown from Puppet Theatre, whose jaw has been ripped open and face modified to give him a passing resemblance to the clown puppet from Dead Silence.
As we walk down the pathway, we expect to see Mary Shaw attack from the curtain, but instead, it’s one of the ballerinas from Dollhouse, wielding a machete, also now with a ripped-open jaw. Neither she nor the clown can scream, making quiet yet hideous gurgling noises. Pushing forward to where the baby puppet had been, we see the Hamlet puppeteer now wielding the head of the “doctor” from the Dollhouse maze. Hamlet survived an encounter with Mary Shaw because the lower portion of his mask had been torn off, but not his tongue or jaw. He attempts, in the form of fear, to begin speaking…” To be or not to be…” before he’s suddenly interrupted by the sounds of laughter, as he is abruptly dragged back from whence he came by the unseen entity, likely Shaw coming back for round two.
Turning the corner and looking up, we do not see the Happy Twin Man… Instead, we see the nurse from the original Dollhouse maze and the Multi-Face Puppeteer from the original Theatre maze, stitched together with ripped jaws in unblinking horror. We’re startled by the appearance of a baby, a mashup of the type of baby we saw in Dollhouse, the hideous-looking doll heads, but with the onesie on. It reaches out to us and cries out, similarly to the “Mama!” from the original maze – “Mary!”. This is the cue, and before we can even scream, Mary Shaw launches herself at us from the darkness ahead, attacking us and likely claiming victory in this battle of dolls and puppets.
As we’ve turned this corner, ice has begun appearing on the walls, as if the temperature had dropped. This transitions us nicely into our next scene…
SCENE 6: WHAT THE HELL ARE THOSE- (INT. SHADOW CREEK LOGGING CAMP – BURNING BARN)
THE HOST
It’s the deadest of winters, as Yetis rampaging through the Shadow Creek Logging Camp get a nasty surprise…your adoring Host had planted someTHING amongst their potential prey…
We walk into the scene and immediately hear the noises of chaos before seeing any. Gunshots are firing wildly into the air, the sound of angry flames and a series of roars…some of them feral, others sounding like something not from this world. Before we can step further, we’re immediately accosted by poor Lumber Jill from the large bush, who tries to reach out to us for help…before getting DRAGGED back by…a YETI arm, but seemingly in the process of ripping itself apart as if there’s something off…the noises, a YETI roar but of a different sound pitch, drives home the feeling that the thing that just took her wasn’t just a Yeti…
We enter the building ahead to find ourselves in the burning barn scene from the original, with one significant, horrific change…instead of a burning door with horses banging on the other side, there is now a large Horse-Thing, ala the Dog Thing from the original Thing film, but looking like a massively dissembled horse. It’s flailing around with tentacles latched on the barn walls as if trying to drag itself away from the smoke and fire behind it, roaring.
Looking around at the barn, more minor Things are crawling all over the walls like a horde of assimilating spiders, though they avoid the spot from the original Yeti maze, which has been burning for quite some time now. In the place where the burning face logger once was, there is now a fully-well logger, Ben MacReady, the Scout Leader, who points and lets out the line that this specific crossover was tailored for:
MACREADY
What the hell are these things?! They’re everywhere!
He points his gun and shoots at the Horse-Thing, which merely roars in response, likely with annoyance and anger flowing through it. We turn our tails away from the battle and proceed outdoors into the cold. Hopefully, these are the only Things in the Yukon, and maybe they’ll be burned out in the barn…
SCENE 7: YUKON ASSIMILATION (INT. THE YUKON – ICE TRENCH / TUNNEL)
We’ve walked into an ice trench, out into the frigid ice. Two ice walls loom above us to our left and right, and there’s no realistic way to climb out of this without slipping and falling. We can hear the angry Yukon wind combing through the trees that we see over the tops of the walls. As we’ve now wandered away from the logging camp, some of the screams and roars have faded…but not for long, as an alien-like screech breaks through the windy silence as the same distorted “Yeti” arm reaches down from above us, trying to snatch us up as well.
We duck and head under where the arm reached for us, thankful when it doesn’t attempt to grab us again…however, we look back up to find ourselves staring at a giant Yeti, albeit heavily battle-damaged, as if this Yeti has been fighting for its’ life against these Things. It still has enough energy in its’ frame to take hold of the icy rocks around it, lean down, and roar right at us. In a way, we wonder if it’s any interested in demolishing humans anymore, perhaps trying to make us “go away” more than anything at this point.
This point may be validated as before we can even make a complete left turn, what used to be a logger rams its way out from a hole in the ice. It has large fleshy spikes in place of arms, a face contorted in a ghoulish look, trying to stretch itself open, and visible teeth coming out of holes in the logger’s outfit. It screeches in our faces and tries to jab us with its spikes, attempting to introduce itself to our bodies and assimilate us. We can avoid its’ grasp, but our only option is to run to where the trenches transition into full-on tunnels, completely encasing us.
Pieces of what used to be a flying saucer are scattered in the ice and encased in the ice walls. Curiously, all of the bones and skeletons that were here are all gone, abducted for some unknown purpose. As we approach some openings in the ice, another Yeti attacks us, wielding one of the bones as a weapon. The fact that this giant creature feels the need to lug a weapon around should be a red flag, one that we may miss. Turning the corner, another Yeti seems to leer at us…but a huge fleshy spike has impaled it through the chest, pushing it at us in a way that looks like an attack. It’s yanked back just as quickly as it appears…and our only choice is to continue further into the caves before we come across a hideous sight.
A large wall of grass, leaves, ice, and flesh is waiting at the end of the line, writhing and pulsing as The Thing entrenches itself ala the ending of the ‘07 Assimilation maze. Many body parts of YETI, loggers, and even horses are writhing and wriggling…before finally, the being teased for the past minute appears to us…the full-size YETI-Thing. It’s a foot taller than any other Yeti…and its’ large chest is ripped open to show teeth; its’ arms have flesh leaking out, fingers extended, legs bent and pulled in a raptor-like fashion, and the jaw is wide, wide open, and ripping with eyes bugging out.
It is a massive, horrific sight, especially as the creature (who also has all the bones jutting out of it to make it extra dangerous) reaches out toward us to try a final attempt at assimilation…thankfully, the beast is slow enough to where we can avoid it, ducking its’ fingers and heading to the cave exit…as the ice melts. The smell of…alcohol begins to flood in.
SCENE 8: BARFIGHT (INT. DEVIL DOGS BAR)
THE HOST
Happy Hour at the Devil Dogs Bar is getting a makeover courtesy of Creatures from another world!
The air is thick, with the smell of alcohol and engine oil. We’ve entered Devil Dogs Bar, the official bar for this gang of werewolf bikers. Intense rock music is playing as lights flash and malfunction. The walls are plastered corner-to-corner with motorcycle memorabilia…vintage posters, helmets hung on the walls, and even old bike parts. Perhaps most ironic is a wall full of mounted animal heads…conveniently, none are of wolves or any canine. Without the pack of werewolves running the inside, it’d be a great hangout spot.
However, the wolves aren’t the only problem this establishment faces. Strange tentacles are bursting through holes in the walls and ceiling. As we walk into the bar, having to shove some thankfully limp tentacles out of our faces, we’re startled by one of the Devil Dogs, souped up with some iron claws attached to the hands, which have some purple blood on them, as if this Devil Dog’s been in the throes of alien warfare. It growls at us and goes as far as to lick the blood off its claws.
We head by the main bar counter, which is made of rough-hewn wood and has a whole cabinet of liquor bottles behind it. Suddenly, a Devil Dog bartender jumps out from behind the counter and roars in our faces while spraying us with beer (water effect). The poor bartender is just trying to do his job, but he has all these tentacles everywhere, seemingly with no apparent source.
That is…until we try to leave the room and nearly get tentacles to the face as one of the Creatures pokes its’ body in from one of the larger holes in the wall, letting out a screech as it wiggles its’ tentacles towards us. We’re able to duck and make our way towards an open door as gunfire rings out around the bar.
SCENE 9: GARAGE (INT. DEVIL DOGS BAR – GARAGE)
The oversized garage of the Devil Dogs bar is quite dimly lit for its spaciousness. Row after row, motorcycles of all makes and models are parked there. A few “skeletons” of bikes are set up, being modified or repaired. Tools, spare parts, and other motorcycle accessories are scattered around the room…and that scattering isn’t just because the Devil Dogs are messy workers.
There is a large hole in the roof above us, and there is a dead Creature impaled on a bunch of bike handlebars, writhing and spraying alien blood (animatronic). The posters and graffiti on the nearest wall are also splattered with blood, containing things relating to the Devil Dogs and their embrace of their werewolf nature and “the open road.” There are also some posters about France and some graffiti referencing a disease spreading worldwide—out-of-place stuff.
We hear engines revving as bikes have been knocked over all around us. This is mixed with the sounds of werewolf vs. alien combat in the room and outside the walls. Looking towards the “exit,” we can see a towering creature looming over the entire area through the dim lights, just watching the chaos.
As we pass by a window, another one of the Creatures attempts to wrap its tentacles around us and drag us through before we can do anything. Still, we’re freed due to the noise of a gunshot…coming from a loaded Devil Dog who was designing weaponry at a workbench when the commotion occurred, going still…until they suddenly turn and shoot at the Creature, also taking out anyone in the way.
We proceed further into the garage, towards the towering Creature…only for a group of lockers to suddenly bust open by us, revealing Creatures of all shapes and sizes stuffed into the lockers…allowing one to jump out at us, willing to invade from any possible location.
We duck its’ grasp and, without any choice, run straight under the towering creature to get to the bar’s exit…where the smell of dead flesh is…apparent…
SCENE 10: BLACK DEATH ZERO (EXT. CATHEDRAL DE CAEMENTUM ANIMUS)
THE HOST
Welcome to Paris, which is filled with things that shouldn’t be moving, yet are! The dead assemble at one of France’s last sanctuaries, The Cathedral de Caementum Animus…where the protectors of this holy ground find their purpose shifting…
We exit the bar…and immediately find ourselves looking up at a vast sight: the facade of the Cathedral De Caementum Animus, last seen over twelve years ago, looms above us…slightly worse for wear, some of its’ pristine windows have been busted in, a sign that the location has been…lesser-used in time. But there is a stirring happening here…there’s a military truck (smashed windows, popped tires) parked just outside of the Cathedral. The living dead have surrounded the cathedral, marching towards it as if they know there must be some kind of “flesh” still living inside.
As we step into the horde, with little other choice, we pass by one of the gargoyle statues. A Plague Doctor, with a loaded needle, launches itself at us, attempting to jab us with what’s likely a twisted strain of the Black Death. It laughs at us as we leer away from it, trying to head towards the opening in the Cathedral entrance.
As we try to approach, one of the zombies breaks from the horde and tries to attack us just beside the entry, trying to cut us off right before we reach a form of salvation. Despite the presence of the plague doctor, this zombie doesn’t look like it has the Black Death; it seems more like a traditional zombie (what any zombie in Dead Exposure would look like without the flashing gimmicks). Nonetheless, it’s trying to bite into us, so we quickly duck away.
As we’re about to enter, we look above us…only to have one of the gargoyles do a trust fall that stops above us! Upon looking up, we realize that a flurry of gargoyles is flapping their wings just above the horde as if planning to swoop down and take the fight to them. We’ve stumbled right into what may be history’s strangest war by the end of it…if we can survive to tell the tale, as we walk into the Cathedral…and oddly enough, we feel something spraying on us as we walk in…
SCENE 11: GOTHIC EXPOSURE (INT. CATHEDRAL DE CAEMENTUM ANIMUS – NAVE)
Our vision is flashing at an intense pace as we walk in…something or someone must have sprayed us with the vaccine for the disease that’s spreading and causing these rising zombies. We look around to get a basis of the room, the cathedral’s nave, and the most extensive section where the hunchbacks living in the cathedral here have relocated themselves… although it may not have helped as much as they hoped.
Barricades have been lodged wherever they can, mainly assembled from the pews spread around the room but occasionally incorporating other items. Makeshift beds on the ground are torn asunder as if they were rushing to escape them…and there are an unlucky few who are being feasted on by the dead that have worked their way into the sanctuary.
Gargoyles are perched above, some set in stone watching the madness, others looking as if they’re about to break free through the flashes…and one gargoyle in particular flies towards us from between one of the aisles, just inches above the living dead horde surrounding us. It lets out a feral screech as we duck under the beast to continue navigating the horde…One of the remaining Hunchbacks reaches out from behind some pews, though it already has some bites on it, sealing its’ fate. It is after this, here we see the initial source of the Sanctuary invasion.
We see a hole broken into the floor, a stairway leading up from underground with the dead climbing up it, and a pathway directly from the Catacombs leading right into the hunchbacks’ salvation. As our eyes are focused on that, a Plague Doctor appears behind one of the pews and reaches towards us, aiming to spread the pestilence. At the same time, a zombie in medieval garb, clearly under the throes of the Black Plague, shambles towards us…only for a second Gargoyle to swoop down above us, just missing our head…but doing the job of warding off the living dead for now, giving us free passage to an exit broken in one of the walls…
Just before we leave Paris, we pass by a miraculously intact desk with some diagrams depicting a ship that looks much too alien to fit in this setting…
SCENE 12: ARTIFACT TERROR (INT. COLUMBUS 1492 – ARTIFACT ROOM)
THE HOST
The Columbus 1492 was lost…and has now been found again, just in time to host an INVASION…of…INTERSTELLAR proportions! Ha ha!
Whereas in the original version of this room, The Artifact had burned a hole in the ceiling, we’re now the right side up and thus take witness to the strange ship-like object spinning on its axis, shooting runes of light all across the metallic walls encasing us, stuck in a steel coffin as chaos reigns around the ship, and this time not just because of The Artifact’s presence.
It’s almost deceiving how “open” the room is, making it feel like nothing can hurt us…until a ventilation shaft right by us suddenly smashes open, a thin Female Crewmate of The Columbus reaching out at us, screaming, as the rune-shaped wounds in her skull and arms seem to be glowing on their own, the closer and closer they get to The Artifact. Just as quickly as she jumps out, it almost looks like she’s yanked back in by something else lurking in the vents.
Walking around The Artifact, feeling its’ runes beaming over us and trying to resist its influence, we’re left wide open to an attack from one of the alien Invaders, a Soldier who shoots its way out of a storage locker in a frantic attempt to grab us. A rune has been burned into part of the alien, though it seems unafflicted by its’ presence thus far (of course, either way, this alien was always going to try and take us down for harvesting).
We continue to work our way around The Artifact…as suddenly one of the Invasion’s alien scientists slinks forward from one of the dark corners, holding “extraction” tools, probably intended for both The Artifact and our organs. It lets out some strange noises, poking its’ tools towards us, sending us finally spinning towards an opening in the wall…just as we hear the ship announce that it’s going to be making some “evasive” maneuvers in the wake of the current Invasion.
Before we can see what that means, another one of the insane crewmates runs at us from a side door just behind The Artifact, trying to stab us with a large piece of scrap metal they picked up in an attempt to inflict as much violence as possible on anyone surrounding him.
We’re able to avoid his blades and duck into the next room…
SCENE 13: INTERSTELLAR INVASION! (INT. COLUMBUS 1492 – BRIDGE)
Entering the bridge room of The Columbus 1492, things are just as chaotic as they were…the captain is still dead, sliced in half, and wired to the wall for all to see. The monitors of the control console are flashing frantically with a bunch of noises, with the screens showing schematics of not just The Columbus but what it can gather of the Invasion! ship as well, as the runes and symbols from The Artifact flash on the screen, the object holding an unbreakable influence at this point. In the section where the captain’s chair is, one of the large Brute Invaders walks around the section, occasionally reaching up and roaring at us.
As we look towards the other side of the room, we see that the UFO from Invasion! has once again crash-landed straight into the Bridge itself. An awkward half-circular shape juts dangerously through the other half of the bridge, the shadow of a Scientist inside the glass portion, which still has lights on. One of the insane crewmates busts in from an open portion, wearing a space suit, and one of the runes is carved right into the glass of his helmet. He laughs at us, pointing at the UFO, with sinister intentions…
As we approach the UFO, one of the Scientists slinks out from a broken portion, holding some human body parts that it’s salvaging from the wreckage to put to use in further experiments…though it may not need these exact body parts for much longer. Of course, it now has a keen interest in us…but also seems fascinated by what’s happening concerning the ship itself.
We move just in front of the UFO wreckage before we can u-turn towards a new exit, a potential escape from this invasion terror. However, we see additional breaches in the bridge due to the crash. Before we can leave, one of the insane crewmates, with his scalp opened up to expose the brain (ambiguous whether it was his insanity or one of the Invaders that caused this), reaches out from one of the holes in desperation before being sucked out to the expanse of space…where in the distance we can see…a floating pumpkin? Strange.
We proceed through the open doors and away from our potential decompression…
SCENE 14: HORSEMEN (INT. COVERED BRIDGE / CAINE CEMETERY – CAREY, OHIO)
THE HOST
Two supernatural entities are duking it out for the SOUL of Halloween! Samhain, The Pumpkin Lord, it’s a Wicked Hallow!
We leave the pull of space and immediately get smacked in the face with a series of hanging roots, thanks to a line of trees overhanging us to the left and right. With our big brains churning, we can deduce that we are, in fact, back on Earth…and seemingly, just in time for Halloween, if the pumpkins hanging everywhere tell us anything. We can duck under a covered bridge to avoid any more roots from the trees…though we have to deal with the fact that the bridge is falling to shambles around us. Through some of the cracks in the side, we see a distant image of a man on a horse on a nearby land galloping through the night.
We get out from under the bridge, and without a second passing, we’re approached by The Headless Horseman…the 2008 version, NOT the giant pumpkin head from the original Wicked Growth…though his fate is evident as the Horseman wields a smaller version of that pumpkin head in his hands. The Horseman laughs at us, though not for long, as one of the Pumpkin Lord’s reapers slices its’ way through the trees on the other side of us, moving towards us and the Horseman, causing the figure to retreat and influencing us to do the same.
As we enter the Caine Cemetery, there are even more pumpkins and roots than the last time we were here, though individual roots and vines are fighting for more space in the overgrowth. Out of one of the mausoleums comes a trick-or-treater who holds out a bag filled with pumpkin seeds, shaking it around as if asking for more. We turn our heads, and out of the same area he came originally is the reaper that was initially here…though instead of the scythe he had initially, he’s now holding a goat horn that looks as if it was ripped out of the stump…sending a message to the competition, one supposes.
We pass by him as he jabs the horn at us, and we go to leave the cemetery through an arch of vines and roots with strands of pumpkin seeds hanging down from the ceiling…
SCENE 15: KINGS OF HALLOWEEN (INT. PUMPKIN LORD’S LAIR)
We enter the underground through the archway, where the Pumpkin Lord’s lair was towards the end of Wicked Growth. Above us, a series of pumpkins are growing, with some bigger ones having malicious faces, as if they plan to attack. However, when we go further, we see that the pumpkins have also begun to rot, as if another influence has infected them.
The pumpkin portions of the Lord’s lair have also begun to rot away, almost matching the color and tone of the walls we’d seen in The Hallow. As we start to weave around in the pumpkin, Gramalkin, The Summoner, appears with her spellbook, telling us to “PRAISE THE PUMPKIN LORD! DENY SAMHAIN!” As she distracts us, a Rotting Pumpkinhead jumps at us from within the rotting guts, wielding a knife, though its affiliation is unclear.
We round the corner and see The Pumpkin Lord in the spot where he originally was, but now the base of his pumpkin is beginning to rot away, a Hallow pestilence infecting it. Despite his state, he still raises his arms and declares to the skies that he will always be Halloween. However, that claim is immediately contested as Samhain comes screaming out of a hole ripped in pumpkin guts, bleating into the air and towards The Pumpkin Lord before turning his insidious attention onto us.
We turn away from both of them and run to the end of the tunnel. We remember it…as one last witch from The Hallow reaches out to try to take us just before we escape. Just avoiding her attack, we run forward, ignoring it as the smells suddenly get much worse, as if we’re heading towards a sewer…
SCENE 16: SPAWNING DESTRUCTION (INT. WYANDOT COUNTY SEWERS)
THE HOST
The creatures Spawning in the sewers of Carey, Ohio, aren’t prepared for an invasion by these Descendants Of Destruction. I wonder why they’d be trying to leave the subway…
Entering the sewers below Wyandot County, that whiff we got in the Pumpkin Lord’s lair is even worse now. The smell of sewage and general decay is forcing its way up our noses. We can hear the sounds of dripping water on all sides (and even feel the water). Though, in the distance, we also hear something else, some kind of chanting as if another group has simultaneously made its way into the sewers. As we begin walking the path of the main tunnel, threats are apparent, and glowing eyes can be seen watching us from many side paths.
Suddenly, one of the Sculders approaches us from one of the narrow side paths, having nestled inside, waiting for prey. It combines its original, more reptilian look and its more “mutated” look from SCarey, fleshy but with scales. It makes a hideous noise that seems to come right from the throat as it mashes its head forward to try and bite into ours.
Proceeding further into the sewers, some more paths begin to open up as we enter territory that The Sculders have left behind in the short term. Thus, we can peek into chambers full of bones, debris, and various articles of clothing. As we’re doing this, we’re suddenly assaulted by one of the Raiders, garbed with sheet metal and a gas mask, who leaps out with an axe and roars at us.
We navigate farther into the sewers, the raiders seemingly unaware of the presence of the Sculders here. But that doesn’t last long, as we can see into a waterway, where a Raider is being crowded by Sculders tearing at him, his scream echoing through the sewers. Turning the corner, we find ourselves in a hallway filled with grates containing a ladder leading us to the hypothetical surface (that seems to have vines coming down from it).
We hear something moving against the grates, generating a grinding noise that digs into our ears. As we look around at the grates, we’re left open to be attacked by a Raider running in from a side path and slamming against the ladder, screaming about creatures in the sewers. Thankfully, we were already aware of the threat. We proceed towards a sizeable broken-open hole in the stone, probably where the raiders came in from…
SCENE 17: DOOMSDAY UNDERGROUND (INT. DOD SUBWAY)
Making our way into the subway from whence the Raiders came (and yes, going from Ohio sewers to NYC subway makes no sense, but nothing here makes sense, so lol), we can see that the light levels (already pretty low with how it used to be) are non-existent now…something has occurred here and plunged the “liveable” portions of the subway into darkness.
We walk the dark platform station and see the remnants of what used to be a camp for the survivors here, torn apart and with glowing plants growing all over it. There’s a train just to our left, obviously not running, but with flickering lights on the inside that seem to be showing us a bloody massacre that’s occurred within, body parts all over, blood on the windows. We’re not prepared for the doors to open and unleash one of the Mutant rocky creatures from the finale of DoD, now creeping into the earlier parts of the maze.
We quickly turn and head into the narrow, cramped maintenance tunnels, the perfect place for Sculders to make their way into the subway. One appears out of a newly formed crack in the walls, reaching out towards us with a screech, with us barely having room to dodge its’ grasp as we squeeze ourselves through and out of the tunnel…
In what is a Raider sanctuary of sorts, there are some rows of salvaged wooden seats, with a dead woman tied to a pole on top of a wooden stage. Spikes of bioluminescent rock and mushrooms have grown into the sanctuary. What were they doing? A sacrifice to the creatures? An attempt to butcher the woman interrupted by the creatures? Something must be more apparent to make a sure guess, but there’s insufficient information.
As we walk up the aisle, a Sculder attacks us from between the seats on our left while one of the Mutants attacks us from the right. Neither cares if we’re between their battles as long as they can take the other creature’s life, both swinging with their claws. We duck their blows, run past the dead woman, and proceed towards our next escape…as faded advertisements of the Meetz Meats business have been pinned to the area surrounding the next door, the smell of meat wafting into the air…
SCENE 18: LEAVE IT TO ROANOKE (EXT / INT. MEETZ MEATS – ROANOKE COLONY)
THE HOST
We took Meetz Meats and dropped it into the middle of Roanoke’s cannibal phase! But, these guys are getting along?! No way, I can’t have that on my show!
We walk into the next room…and find ourselves at the entrance of the mysterious Roanoke Colony. To an extent, the facade is taken straight from the original maze. The gates are there, as are the cornfields surrounding the area. Intriguingly, the body being feasted on in the original maze is gone from its stocks. That brings our attention to the main noticeable difference…a 1950s diner building has been dropped just behind the gates, the Roanoke sign having been completely broken off during its’ “fall” into existence here.
The “Meetz Meats” logo smiles down at us, with neon lights for the lettering. There are windows, but they’re blocked off by the wooden gates of Roanoke, so we have no choice but to walk up and try to make our way in. As we walk up, a pilgrim wearing a Meaty Meetz mask jumps out of the corn, wielding an arm like a chicken leg and humming the Meety Meetz theme as if he’s only recently been taught it.
When you enter the diner, it resembles a larger version of the “deli” scene from SCarey, with its checkerboard floor and vinyl booths. While it’s a diner, the deli-like aspect of a meat row is shown off behind some glass. Walking around the room and harassing us are two of the Roanoke colonists, who have donned a Meetz Meats waitress hat and apron over their colonist garb, walking around with trays of flesh.
Sam Meetz is working behind the counter, chopping things up, waving, and referring us to the day’s specials. In a cannibal colony, Meetz Meats doesn’t even have to have any secrecy anymore (how much did they have in the first place?), which is all the more convenient for the customers of Roanoke, sitting in the various booths, the noises of disgusting chewing and slobbering heard all around us.
As we approach the other entrance, we see something of a decent size glowing green just outside the diner, odd because something that scientific-looking wasn’t in either of the original mazes. Right before we exit, another colonist wearing the Meetz mask busts in through the back door, letting out the infamous “MEAT!” cry. For better or worse, Meetz provides so much that we don’t have to worry as we proceed outside…
SCENE 19: AMAZON CANNIBALS FROM PLANET CLEAVER (INT. ROANOKE COLONY)
We walk into the primary settlement portion of the Roanoke Colony, where we see something that immediately grabs our attention – a giant spaceship has crashed through the church of the community, scattering body parts all around the area as it smushed a bunch of cannibalistic colonists on the way down. Instead of the joyous eating we heard in the diner, we listen to screams from buildings around us, all of which looked broken.
From one of the buildings steps out a culprit—one of Slaughter Sinema’s Amazon Cannibals. She looms over us while waving around the lower half of a colonist it’s preyed upon. We back away from her and pass by a patch of dead farmland, with various body parts “planted” in the ground as if whoever did this was hoping they’d grow into more meat. A pilgrim jumps up from behind the fence containing this farmland, wielding…what appears to be his arm.
As we pass by another building, we see the shadows of a portly man running from an Amazon Cannibal as Morton Meetz, the Barber Chopping relative of the Meetz clan, appears out of a door begging for help before an Amazon Cannibal appears behind him, grabbing him and shoving its’ hands through his chest, revealing his heart and ribs in its’ hands, before it drags him back in by those same body parts, likely planning to ironically, feast on the Meetz clan member.
We head towards the ship that crashed into the church. As we get closer, we see Amazon Cannibals standing on the church, holding up various body parts in the form of victory…however, they have some game opposition (“game” in a variety of meanings, I suppose) as one of the Wendigo stilt-walkers, as well as Meaty Meetz himself with the chainsaw, appear from opposite sides of the church and look up towards the church as if aiming to attack the creatures taking over their shared luncheon.
We go towards an opening in Roanoke’s borders where a deep fog is rolling in…with glowing green eyes looming just outside…more Amazon cannibals…or something else?
SCENE 20: FORSAKEN PIER (EXT. DOCKING AREA – DEAD MAN’S PIER)
THE HOST
These undead fishermen ride up to the shores, hook out, and look to drag this town to the sea out of revenge for the act that killed them. However, they’re about to be interrupted by…undead sailors, hooks out and looking to drag this town to the sea out of revenge for the act that killed them. How similar…
The fog we just walked into intensifies as we go further before we look around and realize that we’ve stumbled upon an entirely new location—the dock from Dead Man’s Pier, though with a slight size boost. The docking area has been beaten down by weather due to a combination of storms and snow, resulting in it being as creaky as ever. Metal supports placed around the dock show visible signs of rust. If it hadn’t stayed stable for this long, we’d almost fear the dock was about to fall apart right under our feet.
Looking towards the end of the docking zone, at its edge, are two ships that we know very well, for better or worse. The boat from Dead Man’s Pier, The Annabel Lee, takes up position to the left. The ship looks mostly as it did, with seaweed and other materials hanging from it…but no Siren singing her song tonight. To the right of the Annabel Lee, drifting uncomfortably close as if it may crash into its’ follow-up…is the Filipa Munoz, Antonio Cabot’s ship from The Forsaken. There isn’t enough fog in the world to block out the glowing green eyes of these Forsaken, a platoon of which are watching us from the ship.
We walk down the dock, whether we want to or not, towards the ships, passing by some storage sheds, usually used to store equipment and supplies but now empty and neglected. The doors of these sheds are either torn off entirely in the case of the first or narrowly hanging on by the hinges for the second. Suddenly, one of the undead fishermen from DMP jumps at us from the first shed, bloody crane hook in hand as we’ve come to expect…but as for the second shed, we see the eyes of a Forsaken in the back of the shed…only for a Forsaken to instead appear just around the corner of the shed, wielding an axe it tries to attack us with.
We walk closer to the ships and step by and around old fishing gear and equipment, taken out of the shed and left here to “die” as much as equipment can. Nets, traps, and baskets, if they weren’t covered in snow and ice, would be covered in dust and cobwebs. We can also get a closer look at the ships. The Munoz has cannons sticking out of the side, and some visible muskets leaned on the boat’s bulwarks, ancient and rusted. The sails of both ships have been torn and tattered by their fates, hanging loose and frayed, in danger of flying off if there’s a bit more wind, it feels like.
As we walk down the dock, right between the ships, we’re suddenly approached by the Captain of the Annabel Lee, who warns that the strings of a violin can attract any soul from a watery grave, even some particularly nasty ones. This is…slightly hypocritical from a guy who’s also leading undead waterfolk that kill people. Still, he wasn’t a Christopher Columbus hater, so he’s coming at it from a better place, one supposes…or would being a Columbus hater be better?
We initially have our pick of which boat to enter. Unfortunately, the choice is just as quickly yanked from us as a Forsaken almost “swings” in from where we would’ve entered the Annabel Lee during the DMP maze, forcing us into the Filipa Munoz…
SCENE 21: DEAD MAN’S DROWNING (INT. FILIPA MUNOZ)
Walking into the FM, we’re re-introduced to the same familiar feeling we always seem to have while on this particular boat—tilting. Yep, we’re on a slant yet again. They just can’t seem to get this thing upright…and it’s being tilted to the right, that we’re incidentally looking up to see The Siren, stood on a ledged portion of the boat, playing her song…to the tunes of slicing, stabbing, and gunshots coming from all around us as the ghostly crews go to war.
We see fishermen and crew members fading in and out of existence around us, battles entering and exiting our realm at a breakneck pace. We can barely track where anyone is within the ship’s interior. Looking, we can see into the Captain’s Quarters of the Munoz, a desk with maps and a bottle of wine, but Antonio Cabot, a Forsaken in an outfit resembling that of a ship captain of the time, leaps out of his quarters with a sword drawn towards our guts.
We carefully navigate the room, looking at the hammocks hanging from the walls, swaying as if the ship is still moving despite being stationary. We suddenly hear the sounds of ripping and tearing as one of the DMP fishermen slices through some hammocks with his crane hook to try and get to us.
As we work towards the front of the ship, we have one last encounter with a Forsaken, who seemingly leaps up a height to peer down over the ledge at us and briefly reach a hand towards us before going back down whence he came. As we approach the escape to the ship, with seaweed hanging down, it doesn’t feel like the floor is shifting back to normal as we hear something resembling…fireworks…
SCENE 22: FIESTA DE VOODOO (INT. STEAMER SUSAN)
THE HOST
The village of The Voodoo Queen has become the target of a town with its beasts of worship—the Chupacabras! It’s going to be a sacrificial fiesta you’ll never forget!
The sideways ramp very abruptly tips back straight as we push through the seaweed, though the incline is now going downward, forcing us to brace our feet lest we tumble down from the shift in flooring. The boat we’re now in is still broken down, but less so, and we’ve made a change in design from the Spanish pirate ship to more of a New Orleans steamer boat. There is a strange combined smell of incense and decay…the fireworks are louder now, with chanting mixed in with them.
We head down the ramp and enter the steamer boat’s galley with a large cooking stove and a long dining table. The smell of food looms in the air, but there is no actual food to be found. From a cooking station, one of the Chupacabra Worshippers, one of the butchers in aprons, emerges with black gunk and zombi “blood” on his person. From a station right next to him, the Scarlett zombi emerges from another station, reaching out at us and attempting to fight the large worshipper, who slices back at her.
As we try to escape the galley, we’re caught off-guard as, from the ceiling before the galley’s exit, a Chupacabra launches itself at us, bloody fangs bore. We duck from it and stumble into the cargo hold of the ship, surrounded by crates of various items…rum, food and drink, and various voodoo artifacts. One of the riverboat zombi emerges from between some crates, wrapped in chains and reaching out…
We see a large opening in the boat leading out to the swamp, but before we can escape, another Chupacabra emerges from an opening in the wall, trying to claim us! We can leer away from its fangs and proceed through the hole…
SCENE 23: CHUPACABRA WATERS (INT. SWAMP FOREST)
As we escape from the Steamer Susan and walk out onto the soft, squishy grounds of the local swamp, we’re hit in the face with thick, humid air. The smell of dead and burning vegetation flows through the air. Fireworks launch into the air, with flashes of lights peppering our eyes with an assault. The smoke from the fireworks combines with the mist in the air, forming a full-on fog that makes it nearly impossible to see.
Trees draped with moss loom over us. We can barely see the sky through them, but the flashes of color “tell” us all we need to know. Through the fog, we see a group of Chupacabras surrounding us, growling…but their presence only distracts us from seeing one of their worshippers, adorned in their large mask, who flings themselves out from the undergrowth at us. We run down the murky waterway, stepping past algae and lily pads…and seeing as more voodoo zombi are rising out of the swamp.
Pushing our way forward to a gathering ahead, we’re attacked on both sides by zombi, dripping with swamp muck, clawing their way through the mist, looking to claim us as sacrifices for their Queen before the Chupacabra worshippers can give us to their beasts of worship.
We enter the gathering and see the battle that’s occurring. We see the shack from the original Bayou Of Blood, as the Voodoo Queen, in her Dead Waters look, is cutting open and gutting one of the Chupacabras without a hint of remorse… However, another one is crawling on her roof, potentially planning to pounce down on her. Down on the floor, we’re walking around a series of voodoo shrines and Chupacabra tents (marked with the bloody symbol from Fiesta De Chupa)…and out of one of the tents, raised on a hill, a Chupacabra launches itself out at us, blood on its’ teeth as the body of a Voodoo worshipper lays dead with bite marks.
A voodoo zombie appears out of one of the smaller, surrounding shacks…only for The Mask Maker to emerge from a shack behind it and slit its’ throat, spraying us with its’ hideous “blood”. We push through, finding a gap in the shacks…though right behind, we can enter it, we see a group of small Chupacabras trying to jump up under a hanging body to snatch it out of the air and consume it. This same group of Chupacabras likely just had their way with a bloody, broken series of chicken cages just to the side of the scene.
Pushing our way between the gaps of the shacks, we’re attacked by one of the sub-voodoo queens, who wields a blade at us as we’re surrounded by hanging Chupacabra heads. Ducking the blade, we see one more strange thing before escaping the swamp…a scarecrow, unmoving on a pole, draped in vines…and crawling with bugs. The vines and bugs aren’t necessarily unusual for the swamp, but they, combined with the scarecrow, are…suspicious.
SCENE 24: REAPED ALIVE (INT. CURSED SOIL FARMS)
THE HOST
Scarecrows seek to punish those who have depleted this barren land. But what about those who are adding too much to it? Seeds have been planted…and BUGS are crawling…
We walk the large expanse of a long-dead field, dry and dusty air, an occasional gust of wind giving us something to breathe from occasionally. Dead crops, withered and brown, make our path for us. Corn and wheat around us is also long dead, their remnants scattered across the floor. At the edges of the open land, we can see faint outlines of the abandoned farmhouses, some of which may be the very ones we entered in the original Scarecrow maze, who’s to say?
Looming above us on our right is a familiar face – the giant spider from BUGS, Susan, is scanning the area for any food…though with no plants in sight, it seems her only option may be us…but we’re “saved” for the moment as one of the scarecrows runs out from behind some wooden crosses where it was playing dead, just as vigilant against this unique kind of intrude as it would be to the humans that stepped on its’ land.
As we narrowly avoid being caught in-between that clash, our eyes catch a small silo…that’s had bug eggs planted all over it, essentially coming a nest for whatever disgusting bug decided to make it home. Just under it, a riverbed trails through the ground, with large cutworms slithering through it, using it as a trench essentially. Suddenly, from around the silo, the culprit of the eggs approaches us rapidly…a large corn borer moth makes its’ way towards us, chewing on some dead corn in its’ maw…but seemingly also having an interest in us.
On the other side of that, we see an old, twisted orchard that presumably used to be a spot for fruit…all of which is now rotting and hanging grossly off of the branches. There are swarms of smaller insects crawling on the trees and some of the rotten fruit, trying to get whatever they can out of it. As we’re staring, a scarecrow slices its’ way through the old trees at us, growling at us.
Finally, we head under the roof of a mini-barn (think Walking Dead barn from 22 / 23 rather than the Cursed Soil barn), where we look around and see old tools, straw, and…scarecrow body parts? This seems to be a “scarecrow workshop” of sorts, where the scarecrows can piece themselves back together, as one lacking an arm seems to be trying to do as we interrupt him, turning and swinging haphazardly with a sickle. Why would he be in need of repairs? Well, there’s two large grasshoppers, who hop out of dark corners in the workshop, right up to us with a loud snapping noise.
Retreating from them, we head deeper in the workshop, as we hear the noises of bugs fade, replaced with the noises of…nature?
SCENE 25: SCARECROWS OF EXTINCTION (INT. FARMHOUSE)
Though the outdoors were filled with bugs, we don’t hear any upon stepping into the main farmhouse itself…in fact, in some aspects, it’s eerily quite considering the chaos going on outside. Also a major shift…there are plants and green all around us, forming a tunnel around us that we must traverse, and at the end of the tunnel is the living room of the farmhouse.
An old sofa and armchairs, decaying, have vines twirling through them with flowers growing. What used to be a coffee table now is a miniature garden, completely infested by plants. There are scarecrows standing around the room, wrapped in vines as if they’re hostages. One ambles forward as if requesting our assistance. Before we can do anything, a Blooming Death creature runs in and roars at us, causing us to pick up the pace.
The kitchen is in even worse shape, with a wall collapsing as well as several visible holes in the ceiling…of which more plants are flooding in through. This entire area is caught in this strange mixture of being completely dry yet also filling to the brim with plants the more time we spend inside of it. As we look, a scarecrow approaches us from a small closet, wielding a rusty kitchen knife, trying to slice at some of the vines. Going around the main island in the kitchen, we’re attacked from a window by a mass of walking dill that reaches in, camoflauging itself with vines hanging just below the window. Around the island and heading towards the next door, we see the glowing eye of something watching us from a high point in the shadows, only for the Pigcrow to burst out with a sickle wrapped in vines and attempt to slice us down.
We evade his swings and duck into the dining room…where one of the titular “Seeds” has plunged straight through the middle of the large wooden dining table, the impact of which has scattered chairs into the wall, where they’re caught in the vines. In the corners of the room, we see some of the pod creatures, planting themselves into the environment. Two scarecrows appear concurrently out of different holes in the room, wielding their blades in an attempt to fight. However, they’re driven off by the appearance of a Cornstalker, a large mutated cornstalk (though all its’ “corn” has fallen out, leaving a weird holey brown long face).
Before he can come after us though, a roar alerts us to the fact that the Beastcrow has arrived, the eye that was watching us in the previous room, and he’s not going to let the Cornstalker take over laying down as the two large creatures roar at eachother, before both stepping back, giving us just enough time to squeeze around the former dinner table and head towards the exit…
But before we exit the farmhouse, we see some strange items wrapped in vines…a novel from one Boris Shuster with the title “Fallen Angels”…and a guitar with some carvings on it of the letters “P.S.” and a strange spider-like symbol…the symbol of the Strengoit. We exit through a doorway filled with vines…
SCENE 26: DARKEST FILES (EXT. KITTY KAT KLUB)
THE HOST
The soul-obsessed entity known as The Collector has preyed on musicians for many generations…but now…actually, I’ll let him explain…
We stumble through the vines to find ourselves at the entrance to an alleyway in the streets of New York, a jazzy tune “playing us in”. Two orange streetlights stand on either side of the opening between buildings, whilst a neon sign hangs loosely from one of the buildings, indicating this as “The Broad Way”. Walking up to it, we see graffiti on the walls that almost seem to “flicker” in and out…showing that behind the generic graffiti are a flurry of Legion Of Horror symbols, as well as message in Latin.
To our left, before entering, we see Boris Shuster leaned against the wall, smoking a cigarette…
BORIS SHUSTER
With the totems contained, set my eyes on another case – a demon that those who’ve seen him say he steals the souls of young musicians. It’s believed he’s connected to the disappearances of infamous names like Pinestraw Spruce and Grover Gray…the Kitty Kat Klub’s been having some strange reports again…
We head into “The Broad Way” as the sounds of jazz intensify…though faintly, we also hear scream and cries of utter agony. There is the typical alleyway trash on the ground…though it’s a lot of old musical instruments and sheet music. Looking up, there are piercing red eyes watching us from broken and boarded-up windows…and suddenly from one of the windows, one of The Collector’s demons, the one from the piano, leaps out at us and roars as if trying to make us turn back.
Taking a corner turn to escape, we see a large mural on the wall of the faces of a group of different musicians, including Pinestraw Spruce and Grover Gray…but suddenly, the lights shift and the loving murals are now of these musicians’ skin melting off their heads. There is something deeply wrong with this alley, as the temperature also begin to fluctuate between blasts of cold and heat.
As we complete the turn, we see two ways, though one’s a dead end covered in a strange black ivy. There are scorch marks on the walls, as well as a flurry of posters from old performances, faces scratched out, some of the dates on the posters being from decades ago. Suddenly, The Collector (in human form), bursts through the ivy, holding a contract up to us…
THE COLLECTOR
So, Mr. Shuster, for the knowledge you seek…please sign on the dotted line, if you please…
We turn left and see The Kitty Kat Klub, looking…slightly more gothic than the last time we saw it, two large iron gates twisted into demonic symbols, plus some gargoyles. The jazz intensifies to the point it covers up the screams from the alleyway…though that doesn’t indicate our safety, as a bouncer with a strange amount of horns walks right up to us and mashes his fist into his palm. We’re not even sure what we’ve done wrong…aside from being here at all.
We advance forward into the Klub…and as we look up, we can get a good look at the sky…bright red and orange, with winged shadows flying towards the Klub itself…seems like a bad sign to me…but we have no choice but to enter…
SCENE 27: FALLEN DEALS UNEARTHED (INT. KITTY KAT KLUB)
Our first look at the Kitty Kat Klub is…familiar, yet very different. It’s the same basic layout but expanded in size to accommodate for quite a few new aspects and faces. The floor looks like dark wood paneling with red carpet laid over it. There is a large wall that’s just portraits of musicians…the collective wall has been labled with a gold nameplate as “The Collection”.
Looking to our left, the bar, long, dark, polished wood. Bottles of strange liquids glow and smoke on the shelves. Some vaguely familiar, clearly demonic patrons sit at the bar…a few of the demons ripped straight from The Fallen. Though worrying about them leaves us open for The Bartender, the symbol of The Collector carved in his forehead, to stick a drink towards us and demand we drink.
Looking over the tables positioned across the floor, at one big table at the back, The Collector in his demonic form sits…but with a special guest, THE Madame Murie makes her return, sat next to The Collector with the Strengoit totem in her hands. One of them, sometimes both, jump up to reach at us, laughing at us mockingly. They’re not just laughing at us though…on the stage, Pinestraw Spruce is forced to perform, his movements akin to that of a broken puppet.
Before they can enjoy more of the performance, Boris Shuster bursts in from the stage behind Spruce and begins to fire down on the demonic crowd, with no damns given as to the consequences. He quickly runs backstage before the demons out and about can pounce on him…and we’re quick to follow.
As we head backstage, we’re nearly immediately snagged by one of the Fallen Angels, who does a plank fall straight on top of us. Backstage is cluttered with more instruments, music sheets, and the belongings of those who now only live as part of the grand Collection. Walking through the cluttered “tunnel” of sorts, one of the Beaut Demons attacks us from within the piles.
As we make our way towards the exit, Boris Shuster and the demonic Collector step out of opposite sides, Shuster unleashing gunfire as The Collector stretches his hands out to take the soul of Shuster…but the conclusion of this battle isn’t ours to witness as we run forward…towards an iron-gated archway with a grave implanted above it…the grave that says “ERNEST LEE” on it…
SCENE 28: CARNIVAL GRAVEYARD GAMES (INT. SAL’S AMUSEMENT SALVAGE)
THE HOST
The souls of Ascension Parish Cemetery have ascended to a new plane…where mad carnies have assembled a junkyard right over the place of their ashes.
Entering the archway, we’re surrounded by a flurry of carnival lights enraptured in a thick fog…we hear the voices of people screaming…though it’s a mixture of screams, some sounding like the screams you’d have on a roller coaster, and the others being pure screams of horror. We escape the tunnel and find ourselves inside the Kritters Kingdom from the original Carnival Graveyard…though the carnies have gone to work turning it into a proper “haunted house” with the supplies they have.
The hallways are narrow and winding, broken mirrors placed all over to distort our sense of view…and one mirror opens up to reveal a Gas Mask carny who reaches out at us, laughing at our fear. As we turn a corner to go down a long hallways, we look down a bunch of hallways…only to realize that at the end of every hallway is a different ghost from Graveyard Games, just watching us as we go by. As we’re distracted by them, a door opens up and another one of the Carnies jumps out, wearing a bladed mask and wielding a knife. He looks around the area, as if confused by what’s going on.
We enter into a room resembling the Luv Shak, where we see the hanging bodies…but instead of the two face-wearing carnies, its’ the two faceless ghosts of the deceased who appear, holding up their own faces, likely implying they took them back from the carnies who killed them. As we turn to go outside, we see the hanging corpses of a bunch of the other notable carnies from Carnival Graveyard, all hung from the ceiling with distorted mouths similar to how Nancy died in Graveyard Games.
We push the corpses’ legs out of the way, aiming to head outside…
SCENE 29: REST IN PIECES (INT. SAL’S AMUSEMENT SALVAGE)
Entering outside to the main portion of Sal’s Amusement Salvage, it’s slowly beginning to look more and more like an actual graveyard…there are graves rising out of the ground in strange places, along with half of a mausoleum that’s pushing out of the ground, displacing a pile of amusement park props. The Glowing Mother is stood on top of the mausoleum, hands raised in the air as if unleashing energy into the “graveyard”.
THE GLOWING MOTHER
You have defiled the dead of this place, now we’ll desecrate your living.
A Grinner rips its’ way out of one of the carny shacks, forcing us further into the sprawling landscape, as we hear the chaos of the traps in the salvage yard going off enmass, repeatedly, as if continuously trying to catch something. Weaving towards The Glowing Mother, Ernest Lee appears from between some wreckage, looking beaten and bloody, and pulls a lever that smashes some barrels together directly above our heads, the leader of the carnies trying to use them to keep the ghosts away…as much as that will work…
Weaving around, we see a mass amount of ghost children standing around us, wearing the masks and costume parts of a lot of dead carnies that are splayed out around us. As we walk through, two of them jump out of their place at us, before jumping back in line. We have no choice but to escape into a dark tunnel…
We hear the voice of Ernest Lee begging for mercy in the dark…before suddenly the tunnel flashes, revealing Ernest Lee’s corpse above us that suddenly drops towards us! After that, the only light left in the dark is the glow of The Glowing Mother…though that fades away as well, as we go farther into the tunnel…
There is a new glowing in the tunnel towards the end…that of a large red circle, a moon…as we hear the sounds of…chainsaws, just as we leave the tunnel…
SCENE 30: MOONS N STEAM (INT. PARISH TOWN)
THE HOST
On the outskirts of Parish Town, a group of young entrepreneurs from “The Horizon” claim they have just the solution to the whole starving problem – enter into their little machine and it shall give blood and water to the moon! The water is especially important…
Leaving the tunnel, we’re able to look up and see the blood moon fully realized, shining down upon us. We also see the bell tower, but instead of one of the moon worshippers, it’s a member of The Horizon, ringing the bell to draw our attention…so that he may preach the teaching of The Horizon…slightly mixed with the moon-worshipping though it’s even more fraudulent sounding…
HORIZON PREACHER
People of Parish Town, give yourselves to The Machine! Give your essence to the blood moon THROUGH The Machine!
There have been banners hung across the sawmill building, advertising The Horizon, a strange contrast of styles with the “faux-Rapture” look of these banners and the rustic red of everything else. We enter the sawmill and the first thing we see is the totem, which in this case is about halfway to completion. There is a line of cultists around the mill, all walking towards the entrance to “The Machine”, a dead ringer for the facade of SnS though recontextualized for the setting, more wooden than the original (but still plenty metal). The one worshipper who seems to be missing from this original scene is Constance herself, the first worshipper…which is suspicious.
As we walk by the line, as well as saw blades that are hanging everywhere plus the tools, some of the moon worshippers step out of line to attack us, before just as quickly dipping back in. Heading towards The Machine, we may feel a bit frightened and try to turn back…but that choice is out of our hands as a member of The Horizon’s Elite, the chainsaw users, waits just around the corner of The Machine’s entrance, in front of a hypothetical exit.
We’re being herded in along with the worshippers…so without any remaining choice, we prepare to give ourselves to the machine…
SCENE 31: MACHINE OFFERINGS (INT. THE MACHINE)
Entering The Machine, it’s very obvious that we’ve walked straight into a trap courtesy of The Horizon, who seek to harvest the water from the easily-manipulated worshippers. Standing on walls surrounding us, tight, minimalist, sterile, are Horizon Elite swinging their saws down, not so much to cut us down but to hoard us farther into The Machine. That being said, some of the worshippers who chose to fight, have been cut down as body parts and blood stain the originally plain walls.
Entering further in, we enter the extraction room, where there is a bunch of machines going off at once, all for the purpose of extracting every single drop of usable “water” from the bodies of the worshippers. From the original maze are those fun “meat presses” that go up and down in endless repetition. New is a process they’ve created that is less gory in nature but seems no less painful. We see worshippers strapped down as metallic tubes have been injected into key points of the bloodstream, beginning to literally suck the moisture right out of them. Going further down, we encounter worshippers that are now extremely emaciated, looking like “skin and bones” in a very literal sense. One reaches out for us, trying to escape, but is unable to.
However, we notice that somehow one of The Horizon’s Elite has ended up strapped down into one of the extraction chairs and is writhing in agony as if the process just began. How’d he end up in there? Looking up at an observation desk, we see that some members of The Horizon have been slain, their blood leaking over the balconies of the room onto the floor.
Entering into a room filled with sleeping cots labeled “RECOVERY”, hypothetically meant for “survivors” but actually just meant for Horizon members, we discover what’s happened…somehow Constance Shyler was able to escape The Horizon’s grasps and has now taken a few of her worshippers, including her daughter and Elias, to take some revenge on the water harvesters. The sterile room is now stained with blood and guts, as well as the symbol of the blood moon painted all over. Now, taking over their facility in revenge for what they’ve done to Parish Town, Constance preaches:
CONSTANCE SHYLER
These men are FALSE-HEARTED…and the false-hearted must DIE!
BLOOD MOON CULT
Lest we all die!
We hear the screams and sounds of cutting and slicing, as well as some chainsaws as The Horizon fighting back ring out, but we’re making our way out at this point, wanting to keep our blood & water intact, thank you very much.
Just as we’re about to leave the room, something stands out amongst the white mixed with red…two books laid on a cot just before the exit, would be easy to miss if a spotlight wasn’t on them and they seemed to glow…the books are “Terra Cruentus” by Elsa Strict…and an unlabeled book that merely has a picture of two dragons, red and blue, adorning the cover. With the books in mind, we step out of The Horizon…
SCENE 32: FIRE, ICE, AND BLOOD (INT. TERRA GUARD RUN)
THE HOST
The nation of Terra Cruentus have received some great visitors from the lands of the ancient past. Dragons fly again…and they see a new nation to take…
We find ourselves walking down a section of Terra Cruentus that seems new to us…a path where there are blood-red stones all over the ground, as if we are literally walking a path of blood. We’re surrounded by the black Gorewood trees…though they’ve seen better days as some of them are clearly burnt, whilst others are frozen, likely due to the rampaging dragons. We hear the sounds of their clashing and see red and blue lights in the sky, as if they’re fighting in the clouds.
There are also some Gorewooden barricades, as well as sections of stone that used to be much larger pre-Dragons. Now, it’s just a collection of ruined sections of walls…weapons from the dragons’ minions as well as Terra Cruentus loyalists are laid on the road. We walk the road, witnessing sparks of power come to the trees around us, ala the opening scene of Dragons.
From the forest suddenly arrives a Body Collector, who looks at us with intrigue, as if gauging if he has time to rip our spine out or not…and the answer is evidently not, as one of Blizzrock’s Frost Demons screams out from the other side of the forest, swinging a blade! We flee down the bloodstone path…and end up in a courtyard, in front of a fountain of frozen blood.
Statues of past Terra Queens and sacrifices (like Eelmouth) line the way…though they’re tough to see through an elemental fog filling the area, as more magic fills the air. One of Pyrock’s Fire Demons attacks from behind the frozen fountain, roaring at us as we journey through the courtyard…where a Knucklegrunt, off the leash with its’ master occupied with brawling, leaping out from behind one of the statues.
We step forward, everything amplified to echoes in this space as we head towards the large Gorewood Tree…which has an “Enchanted Oak’s mouth” sized entrance in it, as well as being under the throes of fire and ice based on the tops of its’ tree. Before we can enter, a Skoolchild approaches us, holding the Terra Cruentus book…
SKOOLCHILD
Let’s play Dead Man’s Wishes with the Dragons!
As exciting as that sounds, our path is forward…into the tree where a grand battle awaits…
SCENE 33: YOUR FATE (INT. TERRA THRONE – GOREWOOD TREE)
We enter into the re-designed Terra Throneroom, now carved out from the interior of the Gorewood Tree in this cycle of Terra Cruentus. Intricate patterns of bark and root create a vibe akin to that of a cathedral. There are pulsing red veins throughout the tree, ala the Gorewood Forest zone. The tree has been scarred by this battle as portions are burning and freezing. The canopy ceiling has bursts of magic going across it.
As we make our way through, we’re attacked on both sides by the warlocks’ skeletal armies…a burnt skeleton and a frozen skeleton, adorned in robes and wielding blades, attempt to slice us down for their masters. We walk into the main portion…and see an image very similar to what we saw near the end of Dueling Dragons…the head and claws of the Dragons, spitting fire and ice, making their way into the tree.
We head towards the Terra Throne, a large wooden seat adorned with bloodberries and body parts…though it’s cracked in half thanks to the battle. As we approach, one of the Ore Mongers attacks us, wielding the Terra Blade itself…but where is the Queen to hold it? We weave around the Throne, to an opening in the back…where a Blood Abbey Monk is waiting for us with a knife in hand, trying to prick us with it.
We hear the voice of Merlin, as if he’s a distant spirit, as we enter a brief dark tunnel…
MERLIN
The Terra Queen has opened my spellbook! And I don’t think she intends to let Pyrock and Blizzrock off the hook…
A barren, dark landscape…where the dead corpses of the warlock forms of Pyrock and Blizzrock lay, their colored blood, orange and blue, splattered across broken Gorewood, mixing with the red. Sitting above them and suddenly launching its’ head forward to chomp us up…is the Terra Dragon, The Terra Queen’s ascension. A black dragon with red eyes and red markings all over its’ body.
We run away from the dragon and towards what looks like a gothic arch from the studio room, symbolizing that our gore-yale is at an end. And we also hear…police noises?
SCENE 34: WEE WOO WEE WOO (INT. BATTLE-GOREYALE STUDIO)
THE HOST
Well, I hope you enjoyed the show…if you survived! Now, if you excuse me…
HELLBLOCK OFFICER
YOU ARE UNDER ARREST FOR MULTIVERSE MANIPULATION! HANDS UP!
THE HOST
Ah, crap.
We return to the Battle Gore-Yale studio…but now in the backstage area, entering into a dressing / break room, with costumes hanging, makeup on the tables, and props laid about. This room has been flipped over, everything’s scattered. Why so? A Hellblock Guard runs into the room with a nightstick, pointing it at us.
HELLBLOCK GUARD
Are you working with The Host?! STAND DOWN!
We flee from the room, not wanting to get arrested after surviving all the horrors of Battle Gore-Yale. We run down a hallway, containing posters of all the matchups we went through, but many of them have been torn down, holes in the walls as the Hellblock officers have been searching for a way to get into the room up ahead…”The Host’s Office”, as the nameplate above the doro proclaims…though the metallic door is wide open for us.
We enter into The Host’s office, his own personal control center. A wall of screens is placed on the back wall, showing scenes and snippets of what’s going on in all the realms we’ve left behind. There are trophies and artifacts from other dimensions scattered around the room, all part of The Host’s collection.
The Host himself, looking very frazzled, as if he’s just been able to run in here, is searching around the room for some form of escape. He turns and sees that we’ve someone come in…
THE HOST
Shut that door or I’ll unleash Adaru’s Lantern on you! Listen to me…
Before he can speak any farther, a Hellblock Guard gets into the room behind him, running up and sticking a stun gun into The Host’s side, causing our gracious Host to shake and spaz as electricity sends him to drowsy town. The guard sticks the gun up at us, so we quickly turn to run out the room, only for a guard with cuffs to leap out at us!
HELLBLOCK GUARD
You’re all under arrest for knowingly participating in this illegal broadcast!
Our final hallway is an empty one with red & blue lights…we’ve been arrested and our Gore-Yale, seemingly, ends in our failure, despite all the things we survived…however, we hear a last conversation…
THE HOST
W-what Hellblock are you guys from again?
HELLBLOCK GUARD
The worst of the worst, scumbag! Hellblock 31!
THE HOST
Oh, is that so? *whispering* Don’t worry audience, I think we may be out of this one in no time…
The last image we see upon exiting the hallway is “The Host’s Calendar,” his timeline of HHN events that he’s personally set up for himself. The day we’re marked on is October 30th…and tomorrow, October 31st, has been marked with “HELLBLOCK HORROR.” We walk back into the night, feeling that our release is likely not long away…
Haunte Couture 